Timeout

I often feel like I'm on the outside looking in... removed.  Then again I also feel as if I'm in a fish bowl - everyone else is looking in, tapping on the glass.  Must be the Gemini in me.

I'm at war with myself... my head vs. my heart.  My head is winning.

I don't understand why people like me.. why do they want to spend time with me?... Why do they even care?  Why am I worth it?

I don't do well with compliments.

I often feel like I've used up all my optimism and happiness.  I'm not very good at covering it up... but I like to  think I am.

My anxiety makes me deaf to those around me.  I sometimes get so caught up in my head that I can't even listen to what others are trying to tell me.  I'm a terrible listener.

I fear being alone - yet alone is what I mostly am everyday.

Sometimes I just need a timeout from it all... I tend to want to push everyone out of my way and out of sight - but I've learned the hard way that that's not the best thing to do.  Instead I need to kindly push myself out of the way for a few days and let myself be.

Trouble is what do I do when I start to push back?

Enter today.